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Quoting poems seems to be easy for authors. We find out who has the copyright, we write and ask if we can use it, we get permission, we credit the author, publication, and the copyright permission holder, off we go.

But a song lyric, hell no, that is a completely different barrel of fish – or crayfish in this case.

So I wanted to quote the chorus of a song by Doris Day in the beginning of my third in a time travel trilogy ‘Scarab 3 Chains of Time’ – but I gave up. Why you say? Well…

My mother used to sing me this old Doris Day song, it basically said, what is going to happen, will happen, I liked it. It seemed apt.  I wanted to use the four lines of the chorus in the preface to my book.

So I googled who owned the copyright, found the company and emailed them. Filling out their form with details such as:

1/ What’s the format of the book?
2/ Who’s the publisher?
3/ Where will it be distributed?
4/ What’s the initial distribution territory?
5/ What’s the initial print run?
6/ What’s the retail price?

7/ Supply three pages before and after quote to show context

Took a little time. There seemed to be a lot of fixation on pricing. Still. I did it. But then I received an email from an agent wanting to charge me a shit-load to get the song lyric for me. I mean it was, sell your first born, and the farm, kind of charges.

‘Nah’, I think ‘thanks but no thanks, I’ll give it a go on my own.’

Next day, a reply from original company:

That copyright is now owned by two other companies, 50/50 – you will need to email them, but; “use the word crayfish in the title so they know it is not spam.”

Okey Dokey. Starting to smell a bit fishy, but….

“Crayfish – I’d like to use four lines from…….” I supply all the information, all over again.

A few days later one of the 50/50 companies responded.

“Hello. Please contact our Australian sub-publisher for handling of your request:”

Ok, they gave me the name Jamie. So I emailed. The next day, Jamie responded:

“Looping in our licensing manager Kate.”

The next day Kate responded:

“As this is a print licensing request, I will pass this onto our print agent to assist. I’ve looped in Robert.”

Great! (by this time I’m starting to want to pull up my cray pot… I mean, seriously…)

The next day Robert responded:

He wants to know, surprise surprise, all the information I have previously taken so long to fill out – twice.

with details such as:

1/ What’s the format of the book?
2/ Who’s the publisher?
3/ Where will it be distributed?
4/ What’s the initial distribution territory?
5/ What’s the initial print run?
6/ What’s the retail price?

And then… another email.

“The other 50% share is represented by a different company.

Although we represent print rights on behalf of (said company) they reserve the right to handle directly the use of the lyrics only in a publication.

Please contact: Yvonne

Sigh, puleeese, I mean, seriously, time is money people. And the three-day rule for fish and visitors was definitely past. This was starting to stink. I was beginning to feel like a crayfish – I’d gone from raw and green to hot and red.

Needless to say, my time travel book quote idea was starting to look unattractive. I was stuck in my own time vortex of email hell.

I’m over it. I might have introduced a whole new audience to that song, who knows. There might have been a massive Doris revival – but long story short, if you are an author, give lyrics a miss, stick to poems – we writers understand each other – and you won’t need any bait.